LJ Idol Week 0- Introduction

2038-01-19T03:14:07Z

I feel a little strange writing this. Last year when I wrote this introduction I was in a completely different place. I was 21, about to graduate from college, planning a wedding, living at my dad's house.

Now, I'm 22, single, pregnant, living with my grandma. I did graduate college, but have been unable to find a job in my field so I have returned back to school for medical billing.

I thought surely by the time this season rolled around my life would be sorted out and I'd be in a much better place, but perhaps it is not my time yet.

So for now, I will tell you a little bit about me at this snapshot in my life in time.

Well first off, this is me:

My name is Lisa.
I live in Southern California with my grandma.
I am expecting my first child, she's due October 16 which is NEXT FRIDAY holy cow, so she'll come pretty much any day now.
I have a wide variety of interests. I'm easy to please.
My favorite food is grilled cheese sandwiches. Always has been. And apparently grilled cheese sandwiches are so important to me that I felt you needed to know that, out of all the other important things I could write about myself.

I have a hard time writing about myself because I never know what to say. I'm not a very interesting person I don't think. I feel like I should have a big life story but I don't. Well, maybe. Maybe not. I guess you can be the judge of that.

My parents divorced when I was 17. My dad remarried and my mom moved to Hawaii to live with her first husband who is my half-brother's dad. So my dad is my brother's ex-stepfather, and my brother's dad is pretty much my step-father. It's complicated, and I'm sure there's a lot more to the story than that.

Last December, I met a guy named Brian. We dated for a short while, about 3 months. I found out I was pregnant in February. He left me in March. I haven't heard from him much since and I'm not anticipating him to be involved in my daughter's life, nor do I want him to be. I feel like being with him was probably one of the worst things that's ever happened to me as he was emotionally and physically abusive. I was very clearly unhappy when I was in that relationship and I didn't see it while I was in it. But that relationship is giving me my daughter and I know she's going to be the biggest joy in my life very soon. Some days I regret being with him but I know when I see Julia's face for the first time I will forget all about the crappy times in that relationship.

I remember last year's intro was much more light-hearted and I feel like this post is a big downer. But it's who I am, and this is where I am today.

I am excited to be a part of this season of Idol even if it may only be for a short while. I am looking forward to meeting new people and learning more about myself and my friends.

The Message Deep Within

LJ Idol Week 0- Introduction